Friendship is born at the moment when one person says to another: "What! You, too? I thought I was the only one".
~C.S. Lewis
Remember kindergarten? When you had been turned loose for the first time in a room full of other little kids you didn't know. Your mom and dad nowhere in sight.
Just you.
Alone.
And then it happened.
From across the room another little human much like yourself smiles and waves and suddenly you've found your best friend forever!
Wouldn't it be awesome if all of our relationships happened with the ease that those early childhood friendships tend to develop? Sadly, as we get older and wiser, we learn to guard ourselves more and it becomes much harder to have those moments where you find those kindred friends.
I don't know about you, but I've gotten really good at being friendly without letting people close. You see I tried it and I'm still recovering from the pain that came out of letting others see the real me. It makes me reluctant to reach out again and share myself with others. I know it's how God wants me to live my life, but the truth....
I'm afraid.
I'm afraid of being rejected again.
I'm afraid of feeling once more like the kid that no one wants on their softball team.
But at the same time I crave friendship.
Not just having people I can bestow the title friend on, but kindred's who get me. Kindred's who are willing to accept me with all of the flaws that I bring into the relationship. Because I don't need someone to point those out to me. I know they are there because God and I are working on them every day.
And then somehow in the middle of the pain that remains in what use to be my authenticity, I find one of those people that make me say, "What! You, too? I thought I was the only one...." I thought that I was the only one to struggle with following God when what He asks of me doesn't make sense. I thought I was the only one to feel rejected when people can't comprehend why I make the choices I do.
And out of that recognition of a kindred comes the courage to send an email, a Facebook message or make a phone call. Somewhere I find the bravery to reach out to that other figure that reminds me of myself. Maybe it becomes a kindred relationship. Maybe it's only purpose is to remind me as God reminded Elijah so many centuries ago, that He has 5,000 others waiting in the wings.
Whatever it is and whatever it's purpose I suddenly feel the stirrings of a hope that soul deep friendships really do exist.
That there are people following God's leading to a path similar to mine.
And I desperately need that hope.
Because I crave friendship.
I was made for relationship and not just with God, but with others as well.
And so for tonight at least, the fear is conquered and the hope of a friendship glimmers in the future.
And the thought remains that where there is the hope of one, more surely await....
